TOPICS
This is where O N L YL O V E helps you.
Studies such as Germany's nationwide evaluation of couples counseling show:
MANY COUPLES DON'T NEED THERAPY
It's not only couples who have questions. Singles, too, may be dealing with patterns, closeness, loss, or the wish for a fulfilling relationship. O N L YL O V E helps you.
Communication & Misunderstandings
“We keep talking past each other.”
“I don't feel heard or understood.”
Different communication styles, withdrawal, blame, sarcasm.
Source: Doss et al., Nationwide Evaluation of Couples Counseling (Germany), Verywell Mind Survey.
Emotional Distance / Lack of Closeness
“We're side by side, but not together.”
One partner feels emotionally alone, the other overwhelmed. Often linked to exhaustion or differing expectations around affection and intimacy.
Source: Sue Johnson (EFT studies).
Hurt, Disappointment, Broken Trust
Infidelity, crossed boundaries, recurring conflicts. Lack of trust, shame, or guilt. According to Hahlweg & Klann, more than 40% of couples name loss of trust as their main reason for seeking help.
Source: Hahlweg & Klann.
Roles & Expectations
“I do more for us than you do.”
Different ideas about partnership, tasks, and responsibilities. Shifting dynamics due to kids, careers, or moves.
Source: Nationwide Evaluation of Couples Counseling (Germany), White.
Family Life / Parenthood
“Since we became parents, we're not a couple anymore.”
Feeling overwhelmed by the parenting role, no time as a couple. Different parenting styles, blended families.
Source: White; Lebow et al.
Everyday Stress, Work & Outside Pressures
Lack of time, stress, being overwhelmed by work, caregiving, or finances. The impact of job loss, illness, and always being reachable.
Source: Verywell Mind Survey (“External Stressors”).
Finances
Unequal incomes or different ways of handling money. Feelings of power and dependence, hidden pressure to perform.
Source: White, Nationwide Evaluation of Couples Counseling (Germany).
Recurring Conflicts & Escalation Patterns
“We trigger each other.”
Always the same issues (“loops”). How you argue, and missing repair strategies.
Source: Gottman Institute (Four Horsemen Model).
Physical Intimacy
Different needs for closeness, desire, and touch. Physical distance as a symptom, not the cause.
Source: Nationwide Evaluation (Germany), Johnson EFT.
Meaning, Future & Identity
“Who are we as a couple – and who am I?”
Life transitions: kids moving out, retirement, starting over.
Source: Lebow et al. (“Emerging Issues in Couple Therapy”).
Singles
“Why do my relationships always end the same way?”
You want to understand which patterns follow you into relationships – and how you can find a lasting, fulfilling partner. No self-optimization, just more clarity about yourself and your needs.
Source: ONLY LOVE practice approach.
Does any of this ring true?
Then send me a short note about what moves you or the two of you.
I'll get back to you soon.
A note on violence and power:
If your relationship is not free of physical violence, get help:
“Violence against women” hotline (0800 116 016)
“Violence against men” hotline (0800 123 9900)
or call 110 (emergency).
Don't feel guilty, ashamed, or like a traitor. Violence is NEVER okay.
A note on the important topic of therapy:
Working in therapy can be very helpful or even necessary.
O N L YL O V E doesn't want its lighter approach to downplay anything that concerns or interests you on a deeper level.
And if therapy is the better fit, I'll say so honestly.